Skip to main content

2018 Reentry...Fighting My Way Back

Dear 2018, I didn't greet you with vision and strength.  My resolutions barely full words, only letters tethered together out of obligation to other's expectation.  I was barely holding on to myself at that time, let alone ideas of a self I was supposed to resolve to work toward. All I knew was that I needed to get up for the sake of my son.  I had to get up to make sure he was getting everything he needed and that I supported his life...When he wasn't present, I was no where near present for my life.  I actively stopped showing up for myself.  The latter part of last year and much of this year is when my disappearance started to become noticeable.  I lost friends and what feels like a multitude of opportunities.   It was quite difficult to face folks anymore.  How was I supposed to explain myself when my words were stifled by pain & shame. 

As much as I tried to be present for my son, he unfortunately felt my vacancy...Every time I left my being in desperation to disconnect from pain & shame, I didn't realize not all of me was coming back.  I was becoming a shell of myself.  I didn't realize how much my son was witnessing & feeling my continuous spiral into an abyss of utter dispair.  I didn't realize how steeped into my sadness he was until he was inspired to write a poem about it... A poem he performed on a stage with so much love and power...It took me a moment to process the words he was saying.  It took me a moment to truly get that he was entrenched in my pain...It took me a moment to realize he was throwing me a life-preserver.  He was me through his eyes.  I'm still reeling from his words.  It was my wake up call to presence myself and get to living. Get back to my purpose.  I love him and thank him for seeing me and reminding me who I am...I''m also grateful for the friends that have patiently loved me and held me up and caught my tears and continually shared their highest most powerful and beautiful visions of me until I could start visioning myself in that same way.

So today, May 1, 2018 I'm vowing to be present to my life.  I'm vowing to not judge my faltering moments, because I will have many, but vow to show up nonetheless.  Today, May 1st i'm picking up my highest vision for myself and not seeing it as weight to crumble under but a foundation to step up and into my destiny. 

Today I vow to not shut the world out but reach out for help & support.  Isolation is a scary, lonely and deceptive place to be.  I vow to be unapologetic with my pain because I know its a process and check my shame because I no longer want to let shame be the leading emotion in my head and my being.  I vow to see 2018 through smiling eyes, a fed spirit encased in a fallible but yet resilient human experience.  So 2018, i'm grateful for your grace with me...no you haven't been gentle for the most part, but you've been graceful. 

So with grace and gratitude I am fully present and accounted for. 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

THE SKIN I'M IN...

NYC-Embracing & Letting Go of This Skin  I 've  been desperately holding on to old shedding skins.  Skin that has puckered and worn out.  Skin that is snug in all the wrong places and increasingly more and more uncomfortable.  Skin that no longer serves me and is completely unrecognizable.  Skin that I've been terrified to let go of and allow to decompose because the new just felt/feels terrifying.  The new feels/felt so different.  I'm not even sure how to wear it or even approach this skin.  What part of me do I dress/address first...Do I start with putting it on from my head or my feet?  Or do I put it on like a front button down dress with at least 100 buttons that need attention?  I'm not sure how to wear this new skin.  I'm not sure how to approach this new skin,  so I've isolated myself more  than ever.  I've hid myself away but I find myself seeking to connect and be held; be in spaces with more than just me & this ill-fitting version of myse

Dear Single Mama!

The Early Years of Figuring It Out! You got this!   Yes, YOU GOT THIS!   I know you’re wrapping presents solo.   I know you might be feeling guilt because you couldn’t afford all the spoils for your babe(s).   I know you’re possibly pushing through some unhealed traumas, negative balances, uncertainty, exhaustion & being the safe space AKA emotional punching bag for said babes…whom you are also wracking your brain trying to figure out how to give them the world & keep them shielded from the perils of that same world including your ish…What am I saying?   You’re keeping your spinning plates going!   You’ve come so far!   Remember when you didn’t have right in this moment (job, an apartment, safety, a couple of extra dollars, food, new furniture, new friends, new love, school, accomplishments…) YOU have come so far!   YOU have done your very best to keep the fruit of your womb safe & supported.   So take a moment to honor yourself as you figure out how to make duct tape look

JESSICA HAMPTON #Sayhername

Jessica Hampton Mother - Daughter - WOMAN  She was on the Red Line train in the middle of the day this past June.  25 year old young woman Jessica Hampton, whom I read was working incredibly hard to get her life together.  She was learning to love herself again. She stopped drinking and was probably thinking of what her next steps to living her best life with & for her daughter who she has left behind...a six year old daughter. Jessica Hampton was loved by many.  She was on her way somewhere and she shook her head no to him and he stabbed her multiple times.  No one stepped in to help her.  People screamed and ran in the opposite direction.  People videotaped her death and took in her demise through a lens and did not step in to stop it. Like many women, she found herself with a man whose intentions for her ended up being violence at all costs.  This individual has gone to jail for this crime against a woman who simply said no to him and yes to herself.  Jessica's daught