Put down the weight even if it feels like it's making you stronger, and create your process so you avoid the chaos. What does that look like for you? For me, at least right now, it is about looking at everything individually verses wholly and prioritizing what you needs to have happen verses what others deem important. I have been visualizing each task as if it was a step or two leading me toward the finish that I have found so elusive for so long. I've been looking at everything that is in need of my attention and giving it attention singularly. It seems to be working, because I am getting things done. Things don't feel so heavy and weighted down. I don't feel like i'm gasping for air. I feel like I am actually going fulfill my goals, really...finally...I exhale
Thursday, June 16, 2011
I feel like so many things have been coming my way like rapid fire. I think that is what happens with growth, the Universe realizes you can handle things and decides to gift you with all sorts of exciting and new projects. The funny thing about these projects is that when you are feeling strong enough to carry the weight of the world, you can knock out your to do list 2 to 3 tasks at a time feeling fueled by the completion of it all. So what do you do when the weight becomes to heavy to bear? Well, some people drop it and others carry it until it almost takes them out. Either way, certain things end up falling through the cracks or lost in the shuffle and chaos ensues. Chaos because all those little things although small can form a funnel cloud of details that can destroy every little bit of work that you had already done. Scary!
Monday, June 13, 2011
Looking through my files, I've found multiple folders in varying colors all containing pages upon pages of yellowing paper welcoming me to be a part of something that I chose to be a part of. Whether it be a new job, an elite group, health club or some credit card, I would receive a step by step instructional packet of what I could should expect from being one of the chosen few to reap the benefits. "Welcome to our state of the art health club!" "Thank you for being a team player with The BEST Agency, please read on to understand your role." "Welcome to insert credit card company name here, read on to get a more complete picture of our membership rules...don't forget the small print and oh, here is an 800 number you can call to get an answer or any and all of your questions."
Well, for the last twenty plus years, I have been looking all over the place for my welcome to life packet or better yet, welcome to adulthood, or welcome to motherhood or the surprise, welcome to suddenly getting grey in unexpected areas or the exclusive, welcome to OMG, i'm over 4o and still waiting for the love of my life club"...I could go on and on. Yeah, I know i've been looking for those packets in vain, but you can't blame a girl for dream, can you?
According to some cultures, we choose our parents, in others we are cast into our families, whatever the route we take to get here, we are subjected to traditions we are born into and the consequences of the choices our parents make on our behalf. Those choices inevitably create the foundation that affects how we navigate the ins and outs of our lives. You need examples...Let's say you are born into a family steeped in it's traditional culture and because of that culture, you are to follow said rules and live your life much like your parents, grandparents and ancestors before you. Easy enough. So you do what you are told through the adolescent years and barely survive the teenage years and early twenties, but you do. You look to your family as a template of how to then move into adulthood, the only problem is, steps 24-35+ are not only not the same as your family's, but they are out of order and written in shorthand! So then you try with everything in you to fix what is different, but realize after years of trying to get your life back in the "proper" order, the rules don't seem to apply to you anymore. Here is where the foundation laid at birth comes into play. Do you continue to fight to fit into this familial template that now feels like a vice because you don't want to be the one to break any traditions, or do you create a new beginning for yourself knowing what you could possibly loose? Complicated, right!?!
The thing is, it doesn't matter the scenario, there is a point in all of our lives when we stop and realize although we might have been raised a certain way, our lives are our own to live, at least in most cultures. So many people in the world, especially women, are subject to their culture and living their own life becomes a life or death issue.
For those of us who have the prerogative to live our lives the way we choose to, I think our challenge comes when the rules are amended. Where did I put that Welcome Packet!? We try to figure out who to go to and what to ask and is this the best decision for this situation? The rules changed and I don't know what to do. Can anyone help me? If I decide on B, will A & C still be available if I change my mind? Where is my welcome packet? Where do I sign, because this is just a bit harder than I thought. How affected will my life be if I change everything right now? Did I really just adjust my whole life with this one decision? Now what? I guess you just do it! Just stop asking how to live it and just live it. Well, at least that is what I keep telling myself.
What is satisfying though is when you do choose B, and your family cosigns your decision. Even goes as far as telling you they are proud of you!
Nourish Nurture Sustain & Build ~ Mother's Milk
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Today is another successful day. Today I am spiritually grounded and my feeling of love is palpable. Today I do above and beyond my own expectations. Today is good...I am connected to everything and everyone. I am love. I can love fully and understand the meaning of it all. Actually, I'm not sure if I completely understand the meaning of love, but I do love, I can love.
God, squeeze my hand when I walk, so I may walk courageously through this day. I have so many behind me, there is no reason to feel less than anything but loved. Stellar!
Feel loved today, feel courageous today, feel supported today!
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Good evening folks. I am full of all sorts of emotion as usual, but feeling more solid. My emotions feel like they are like strings on a guitar, they need tuning- tightening, loosening, changing, strumming. They snap when played to aggressively and fray from over usage.
There are a few key things that can ensure the strings are getting the best possible usage, care however you want to think of it...The guitar itself should be solid, sturdy and in all around good condition; the owner, caretaker, player should have a full understanding of the ins and outs of the guitar as a whole as well as a loving connection.
A few posts prior I spoke of waking up in the AM and loving on myself, and connecting with my spiritual center with prayer and meditation. I noticed, on the days when I consecutively connected and loved on me first thing in the AM, I felt strong, centered and in harmony with my emotional carriage.
I fell off the morning spiritual love me fest and found myself completely out of tune. So much so, I physically became ill, coincidentally with a head cold. I basically left my guitar in the hands of my carnal self. Well, we see those results weren't conducive to harmonious living now were they... So in hopes of getting my proverbial strings tuned, I started praying, meditating,exercising and eating right. I can confidently state that my emotional strings are feeling more secure with the body and is safely back in the arms of my higher self, my spiritual guide, God, Allah, Yeshua, Buddah.
This is not a simple journey whatsoever! I just know that I need to be on it and really present. Not just physically, but emotionally present. My strings are tuned up and ready. Strummed by my spiritual self with complete and utter guidance and support from my higher self, or whom I called God.
Nourish Nurture Sustain Build ~ Mother's Milk