Skip to main content

Mother's Sixth Sense

Life is what you make it.  I've learned that through so many lessons and in so many ways over the years.  Most of those lessons i've learned have been from the women in my life.  Some have been my ride or die homies who have mothered me through whatever emotional or physical trauma I was experiencing to the random momma stranger on the street who's momma .  It was these moments that made me understand the importance of my circle of women.  

I'm so thankful for the many times I was emotionally rescued by these surrogate mothers in my life also known as my friends, my sisters, my aunties, my co-workers, my son's friend's moms, my friend's moms, and at the top of that list...my mom .  Women who had no obligation to my healing.  They simply were expressing their mother-nature, an extremely challenging emotion to avoid.  It's like an impulse...much like child birth when it comes time for a woman to push, it is an impulse that women cannot stop themselves.  It just happens.  There are no questions of weather she wants to push, she just needs to...impulse.  The impulse to mother weather a woman has physically given birth or not is simply an additional sense...touch, smell, taste, hear, see, nurture...I believe it is the sense that makes a woman.  

So imagine that extra sense in action when a woman does become a mother.  When the universe bestows on her a child(ren).  The sense of nurture becomes the dominant sense to the fives senses which are now tools used to strengthen or sharpen the nurturing of a child.  Making sure that all spaces the child comes in contact with is safe to touch, smell, taste, hear and see...making sure to keep the child away from anything that could adversely affect the "sub-senses".   

In my space of thankfulness...I acknowledge myself for showing up when it was super challenging but knowing that my heart was full of love and nurture for my son.  I chose not to stop.  I chose to nurture and him and shield him from the negativity that he has touched, smelled, tasted, heard and seen.  I, his mother, chose to be just that...his mother and boy am I blessed because although it has been 16 plus years, I am still amazed that I was the one chosen to raise him, I was the one chosen to guide him, I was the one chosen to love him, I was the one chosen to be his mother.    In that acknowledgement, I also know that in choosing to mother him, I must also remember to allow myself to be mothered...to allow someone else to use their sixth sense to help me heal and be my strongest self so that I can be the best mom to my boy.

Ashe...Happy Mother's Day!

Please also check out my podcast and let me know what you think:







 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

THE SKIN I'M IN...

NYC-Embracing & Letting Go of This Skin  I 've  been desperately holding on to old shedding skins.  Skin that has puckered and worn out.  Skin that is snug in all the wrong places and increasingly more and more uncomfortable.  Skin that no longer serves me and is completely unrecognizable.  Skin that I've been terrified to let go of and allow to decompose because the new just felt/feels terrifying.  The new feels/felt so different.  I'm not even sure how to wear it or even approach this skin.  What part of me do I dress/address first...Do I start with putting it on from my head or my feet?  Or do I put it on like a front button down dress with at least 100 buttons that need attention?  I'm not sure how to wear this new skin.  I'm not sure how to approach this new skin,  so I've isolated myself more  than ever.  I've hid myself away but I find myself seeking to connect and be held; be in spaces with more than just me & this ill-fitting version of myse

Dear Single Mama!

The Early Years of Figuring It Out! You got this!   Yes, YOU GOT THIS!   I know you’re wrapping presents solo.   I know you might be feeling guilt because you couldn’t afford all the spoils for your babe(s).   I know you’re possibly pushing through some unhealed traumas, negative balances, uncertainty, exhaustion & being the safe space AKA emotional punching bag for said babes…whom you are also wracking your brain trying to figure out how to give them the world & keep them shielded from the perils of that same world including your ish…What am I saying?   You’re keeping your spinning plates going!   You’ve come so far!   Remember when you didn’t have right in this moment (job, an apartment, safety, a couple of extra dollars, food, new furniture, new friends, new love, school, accomplishments…) YOU have come so far!   YOU have done your very best to keep the fruit of your womb safe & supported.   So take a moment to honor yourself as you figure out how to make duct tape look

BIG UPS TO THE KID & HIS OG (aka his Mama)

Move Out Day! "To love means to embrace & at the same time to withstand many many endings, and many many beginnings- all in the same relationship"   Clarissa Pinkola Estés (Women Who Run With The Wolves) I was recently speaking with a friend of mine about raising our sons.  Our boys are on the precipice of crossing over into young adulthood.  Roaming the world with less of a tether...making their own decisions... Somedays I wish I could somehow put my son back in my belly.  Somedays more than others, I wish for this extreme unrealistic regression because at least when he was in my belly; he was tucked in that protective pouch filled with fluid to pad him from any jarring experiences.  I wish I could protect him from EVERY bump, ditch, divet, tsunami, tidal wave, earthquake type of trauma...but I can't and those times where all I can do is be a place for him to lay his burden down and soak up is pain filled tears...I squeeze him with all might in hopes that my arms and