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Worthy, Who Me?

I am worthy.  I...AM...WORTHY!  Such a simple statement, yet it has taken me much of my life to realize this about myself.  That previously mentioned sabotage machine that always seems to be fueled and ready at any given time, well besides fear, this machine is fueled by my lack of self worth.  Occasional internal dialogue when I was particularly low: "Why are you pushing so hard?, it never works out for you, truth is, what makes you so special? You really aren't worthy of what you are working for."

Sorry, I didn't mean to take you so deep into my head, but it helps make the point and I'm not so lost or feeling that low anymore.   I've come a very long way, but with any freshly healed wound, a wrong move or extra pressure can reopen it and healing has to start all over again.  The upside of reopened wounds is that they are rarely as deep at they originally were because of the deep healing that has already taken place.

Okay, so let's get back to feeling worthy and the many challenges that come with it.  Self worth is something that from birth needs to be nourished from birth.  Letting a baby or child know how worthy of life it is by loving, hugging and kissing them and sacrificing for their well-being lays the foundation.  Unfortunately, all the love and sacrifice that has been put into this little being to create a bubble of self worth can be instantly undone with one bad encounter which ends up having enough impact causing a lifelong affect.

I am worthy...I think, or at least that is what I want for myself is to be worthy of all these wants and desires that fill my being.  How do I live up to these wants and desires?  I guess I start by nourishing what has been starved by slowly nourishing my self worth.  So, I just start from the top of the list, taking one want and desire at a time.  Telling myself every step of the way that I am worthy, that God did pick the right person to fulfill this desire or want...me.  I AM WORTHY!

Nourish Nurture Sustain Build ~ Mother's Milk


  

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